Romance, Taylor Swift, and the Heterosexual Script

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8xg3vE8Ie_E

When I think of popular notions of romance, I think of very gendered and scripted examples with rigid rules. With these two ideas in mind, I wanted to explore how messages about gendered sexual scripts and romantic beliefs combine in popular songs, and how exposure to romantic messages could potentially feed into a consumer’s belief about gendered relationships. Specifically, I want to see how notions about romance and the heterosexual script combine in a popular (if a little old) Taylor Swift song.

Unsurprisingly, Taylor Swift’s “Love Song” contains and perpetuates all four domains of romantic beliefs measured by Lippman, Ward, and Seabrook (2014): Idealization, Love at First Sight, Love Finds A Way, and One and Only (133). In the song’s first line, the speaker says, “We were both young when I first saw you,” and then proceeds to recount the memory of meeting her significant other, signifying the significance of the first time they saw one another (l. 1). This focus on a picturesque and romantic first meeting feeds into the idea of Love at First Sight, or that one can fall in love at a first interaction.

Throughout the song, the speaker discusses the challenges and problems in the way of her relationship with her “Romeo.” Through it all, she continually reinforces her love for him; for example, she says things like “This love is difficult but it's real,” which shows that she thinks “real” love will last through the difficulties. In the end, their love works out despite all the opposition, showing that love finds a way – at least in this song. The speaker’s continual desire to run away with her significant other also feeds the idea of Idealization, because she believes that this romantic relationship will make solve her problems and erase everything that makes life difficult for her. Therefore, she idealizes the relationship and dreams about what it will bring her. Finally, the speaker also slightly touches on the idea of One and Only, or that there is only one person for her. She does this generally, with the idea that she continues to fight for the relationship instead of moving on, and specifically using lines like “you were everything to me” (l. 23). Clearly, “Love Song” portrays common and stereotypical media messages about romantic love.

But the romantic messages aren’t the only ones the song sends to listeners. The lyrics also adhere to gendered scripts, like the courtship script discussed in Kim et al (2007) which shows men as aggressive and women as passive. Specifically, the song emphasizes the man’s responsibility to take action and the woman’s passive position. For example, in the speaker’s rumination on the couple’s first meeting, she remembers that he came to talk to her – being the first to take initiative. When the speaker says, “Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone / I’ll be waiting,” she clearly relies on her male counterpart to take action for her (ll. 13-4). Even when she says she grew tired of waiting and met him “on the outskirts of town,” she still asks him to save her. It seems she only has enough agency to put herself in the position to be saved by her man. Even looking outside of romantic love, she sings that one of the main obstacles in the way of her relationship is her father’s disapproval. Therefore, she is seemingly stuck between her father’s disapproval and her boyfriend’s pursuit, passively waiting for men to make life-altering decisions for her.

One potentially surprising aspect of this song, though, is that it doesn’t perpetuate any other parts of the heterosexual script. For example, both the speaker and her male counterpart seem to be equally committed – he willingly proposes marriage, as opposed to the commitment-phobia that a lot of male characters on television shows and films exhibit. Since the song is fairly G-rated, there isn’t a lot of room for the sexual double standard to show, and the narrow nature of the song doesn’t really allow for the audience to see whether the homophobia script plays out. So though the gendered courtship script is very evident, the rest of the heterosexual script is left out in favor of highly romantic content.

I think it’s important to look at these ideas together, the romantic beliefs and the heterosexual script, and identify how they exacerbate one another in media depictions. I’m curious to know if these aspects of the heterosexual script and romantic beliefs always correspond in the way that they do in this song, or if they sort of mix and match depending on the song’s content. Either way, as a life-long consumer of mass media – and a critical one as of late – I’d guess that this interplay between romance and gendered scripts is widespread over many types of media.

References:

Kim, J. L., Sorsoli, C. L., Collins, K., Zylbergold, B. A., Schooler, D., & Tolman, D. L. (2007). From sex to sexuality: Exposing the heterosexual script on primetime network television. Journal of Sex Research, 44(2), 145-157. doi: 10.1080/00224490701263660

Lippman, J.R., Ward, L.M., & Seabrook, R.C. (2014). Isn’t it romantic? Differential associations between romantic screen media genres and romantic beliefs. Psychology of Popular Media Culture, 3(3), 128-140. Doi:10.1037/ppm0000034

Swift, T. (2008). Love Story. On Fearless [CD]. Nashville: Blackbird Studios.