Are Selfies The Next Sexual Socializer?

While we are all familiar with the #selfie song by the Chainsmokers another song by Nina Nesbitt titled “selfies” takes a different approach to the phenomenon of Selfies. 

Here are some of the lyrics from Nina’s song:

Since you walked out my life again

Yeah

So I strike a pose and tilt my chin

And hold the light to suit my skin

Your favorite t-shirt on again

Throughout the song, she explains that the reason she takes “selfies” is so that her ex boyfriend can see her.  She sings that since he left her she adds “selfies” to her profiles looking her best and wearing the shirt that he liked most on her in hopes of him seeing it.  Some of the later lyrics go like this:

Guess I'm reaching out to be assured

All I wanted was to be adored

This shows that Nina is saying that the only reason she is posting pictures is for her to get attention and is basically a cry for help.  In the music video she even goes far enough to write “Selfies…the life we want to show you” as one of her last captions to her photo.  She does this to show that selfies are not real and are a cover up of her actual life.   

We learned in class from the guest speakers that “selfies” can be taken for a majority of different reasons.  One particular finding she discussed was that “selfies” are not usually added for the self-loving reasons that we think they are.  In this song we see that Nina is taking selfies not because she is happy and vain and wants everyone to see, but instead because she wants to appear that way for a man.

While her song seems to be outing herself for missing her ex boyfriend and wanting to impress him, she does not out the sexual script.  She is showing that she has to look good in selfies to get his attention, has to use passive and alluring strategies such as seflies to gain his affection, and show herself off.  She succeeds in showing some of the stigmas regarding selfies but fails to break the stereotypes of the sexual script. 

While selfies are such a new form of social media they are already providing unhealthy sexual messages about what they mean.  As we discussed in class media is moving so fast that research needs to be able to catch up.  We have to learn to solve the issues of sexual information in the media before it continues to move on to newer media forms. 

Kim, J. L., Sorsoli, C. L., Collins, K., Zylbergold, B. A., Schooler, D., & Tolman, D. L. (2007). From sex to sexuality: Exposing the heterosexual script on primetime network television. Journal of Sex Research, 44(2), 145-157. doi: 10.1080/00224490701263660